Obsessed
by DeathNoteFanatic12
Summary: Chocolate isn't Mello's ONLY obsession. YAOI ALERT!
1. Prologue

Mello stared at the albino, just as he did every day. Being sure he looked as angry as possible. If anyone ever found out what he truly thought...Let's just say it wouldn't be pretty. Mello stared, intensely. He did not hate Near. Not at all. He truthfully LOVED Near, but n one would ever know of that fact.

He gazed until the bell rang, then he stared as they all struggled out of the small room, and to the dorms. As they each departed into their rooms, he waited so he could stare a little longer at the entrancing boy. He then went to his room and thought about him. Mello was OBSESSED. 


	2. Chapter one : Almost confessions

The blond sat on his bed, reaching beneath it to retrieve a box. He opened it, reveiling it's contents: money, chocolate, and a picture of his favorite obsession, Near. He pulled out some chocolate along with the photo. As he popped the candy into his mouth, he stared intensely at the photo, as if trying desparately to read a nonexistant message within it. He ran his finger gingerly across the photo.  
"Near...You're so...perfect..." he sighed, " If only you knew..."  
Mello would never tell him though. He may spread it around and Mello's reputation would go down the drain. He stroked the picture again, gently and lovingly. He loved this picture more than any of his other possessions. He'd even give his chocolate for it! A knock on the door brought him crashing back to reality.  
" H-hold on a sec! I'm...changing!" He screamed as he placed the photo carefully back in the box. He had already changed clothes, thank god, or he would, but he didn't believe...so thankfully. He answered the door to find the albino in question staring emotionlessly at him. Mello quickly faked a scoff, " Oh, hi Near. What do you want?" " I came to ask Mello a question. I have pondered this thought on multiple occasions but have had no success wahtsoever in finding the answer to this particular problem.." Near said, emotionlessly. Mello resisted the urge to glomp him, as he found his emotionlessness to be utterly adorable.

"Uhhh...ok..." he answered. He moved out of the way to allow the boy in. Near hesitated slightly, then entered. Mello sat down on the edge of his bed. " You can sit.." he motioned for the albino to sit beside him on the bed.

" I'll just sit on the floo-" Mello pulled him onto the bed, forcing him to sit next to him. " Or I'll sit here..." Near corrected himself in a way that Mello almost thought to be sarcasm...but he quickly forced those thoughts away. For a while they sat in silence, almost starting to talk, then closing their mouths awkwardly after a thought. Mello couldn't take it any more.  
" So, what was your question?" he finally managed to ask. Near looked at him as if he were about to start, then looked down awkwardly as if he were regretting having come. Mello hoped not. He'd always wanted to get his little lamb all alone. He really wanted to talk to him about how he acctually felt. Near began without raising his head..  
"Mello...do you...like anyone?" he asked, his face turning a slight, almost unnotable shade of pink. Mello shifted awkwardly. How was he supposed to answer that? Was this reallynhis queston? Or maybe it has to do with it...but in what way? Is he confused about sex ed class? Is that it? That's probably it...Mello decided after thinking.  
" Near, if it's about sex ed, just ask me outright. I'm not gonna embarass you, okay?" Mello laughed slightly. Near looked slightly shocked, but he quickly returned to his emotionless facade. He looked up at Mello, twirling his hair between his fingers. This was another trait Mello found to be cute. Dammit! he turned away, He's too damn cute!  
" M-Mello...It's not about class...I wanted...advice." Near lied. Mello was none th wiser, however. He turned back to Near, a slightly dejected look on his likes someone?, Mello thought, But who?

" Ohh...You have a..crush." he forced a laugh, smiling awkwardly. He was utterly heart broken! He still wore the smiling mask, however strong his feelings were." Who is it? I can help better if I know who it is.." " I-I can't tell you that!" Near blushed, turning away, trying to mask his overflowing emotions. " It's...personal.." he added awkwardly as Mello gaped at his sudden burst of emotion. He quickly returned to his smiling facade and questioned the younger boy.  
" Why? It's just a girl, silly! Or..is it a ...-You're GAY?" he stopped himself from adding 'too' to his shocked exclaimaion. He couldn't allow anyone to know his sexuality, as that, too, would kill his rep.

" If by that you mean that the feelings I am currently harbouring are for another male, then yes." Near had returned to his neutral coolness. Mello stared in awe at the fact that a boy one year younger than him could admit this to someone with such ease, while he could barely tell himself! he closed his mouth in an attempt to regain his composure, but quickly failed by falling from his perch on the bed. This caused Near to giggle. Mello could barely contain himself!

Near extended his arm towards Mello to help him up. The blond accepted the boy's hand and was pulled up. He sat back on the bed. Near shifted slightly, bringing his finger to his mouth. Poor Mello! The boy looked utterly irrisistable now!

" Uhhh..S-so...who is it..I won't say anything..I just want to help.." Mello stared at his adorable "rival"," I could...give advice.."

" O-okay. Fine. But Mello cannot get angry, no matter what, okay?" Near said quietly.  
"I won't. Now who is it?"

"M-Mello, I...

CLIFFHANGER! 


	3. Chapter two : Bad news

" M-Mello I-"  
The boy was interupted by a knock on the door. Matt walked in the room. Mello knew something was wrong, first off, he barely knocked, second, he looked worried, and third, he had no form of hand-held game in his hands. Mello's assumptions were confirmed when Matt uttered the words, " Roger wants you. Both of you. Now, in his office.." he said staring at Mello seriously. Matt was NEVER serious, unless it involved video games, but Near had nothing to do with Matt's wierd obsessions. Though Mello had no room to talk when it came to strange obsessions.  
Mello's train of thought was shattered when the albino stood slowly and began to make his way to the door. Near turned his head around, facing Mello," Come on Mello, he said 'both'." And with that, the two made their way to Roger's office.

" Okay, so what is it Roger?" Mello asked. Near had placed himself on the floor, a white puzzle occupying his attention. Mello was slightly shocked by Matt's actions, and wanted to see the cause of them. Roger's grave expression made Mello all the more nervous.  
Roger looked up, a worried expression inveloping his features. He opened his mouth to reveal the three most horrifying words for the two boys currently occupying his office," L is dead."  



	4. Chapter 4 : Saviour

**Okay...I know it's been like...a year since I updated, but I have good reasons? Okay I have no good reasons, but I DO feel bad about it!**  
**So...Forgive me?**

** Obsessed, Chapter Four : Saviour **

To come so close, then have everything you want ripped away when you were just about to take it. That was true pain, a pain Near became accustomed to after Mello left Wammy's. Near himself had no interest in catching Kira, all he wanted- all he NEEDED -was Mello. He came so close to finally telling him, after years of loving him from afar, only to have it torn to shreds by fate's cruel design.  
" I hate this...that I'm so weak.." He mumbled to himself as he made yet another cut in his overly abused arm, already littered with scars and bruises. " I hate that I need a crutch like this, just to get by..." He always hid in the closet, as far away from prying eyes as he could manage to be. It had become a ritual of sorts, and though well known around Wammy's, no one ever interrupted his actions, therefore he never locked the door. " He could never love me anyway...I'm the freak, the albino who always got in the way." He muttered to himself bitterly, too caught up in his self loathing to hear his door opening. And then the closet was enveloped in light, causing the pale boy to look up at the intruder, unshed tears in his eyes and blood trickling from his wrist. And then empty black eyes met furious ( and worried? ) blue before he was pulled to his feet by the very cause of his anguish. " Near! How could you do this to yourself? Yeah, I found out! Matt told me! How could you be so reckless? Don't you think about how this affects those around you? Goddammit, Near, I lo-" He cut himself off, eyes wide in fear, " I need competition! You can't just wimp out on me, dammit! " He covered his almost slipup smoothly, fury rich in his voice.  
" M-M-Mel..lo...It's you..." Near looked into the angry azure eyes before him in awe. " It's really...you..." A small, sincere smile crept onto his face, his eyes overflowing with tears as he lunged forward to hug the taller teen tightly, burying his face in the other's chest and sobbing. " You're back! You're really here! Mello! "  
Shocked by his thought to be rival's moment of weakness, Mello placed his hand awkwardly on the smaller teen's back, rubbing it in what he hoped to be a soothing manner. " Y-yep, Near. I'm back..." He muttered, his face heating due to the close proximity of his greatest obsession. " I had to come back...to stop you...because I..." He looked down at the fragile youth in his arms with an unreadable expression, grabbing said teen's jaw and tilting his head upwards so as to force eye contact. " ...I care...about you." His fingers pulled the face inches closer, whispering the words falling like a waterfall from his lips. " I...need...you here. I want...you here...because, I..." Their lips were merely centimeters apart now. " I love- " Just then the door sprang open violently, causing the two to push away from one another quickly and look over at their intruder, one very angry Roger glaring straight at Mello, who was now half way across the room from the shorter, white clad boy he was only centimeters away from before. Said blond shot a quick over in Near's direction, their eyes meeting and locking for a minute before the third presence made himself known again my coughing angrily, causing Mello to refocus his attention to the old man quickly.  
" Mello! You disappear for TWO MONTHS, then return OUT OF THE BLUE and don't TELL anyone about it? " The grey haired man was furious, sounding like a father scoulding a runaway son. " Have you any IDEA how worried I was? What were you THINKING? Were you even thinking AT ALL? " He glared frustratedly at the lithe teen who simply rolled his eyes and huffed in irritation.  
" OBVIOUSLY I was thinking I wouldn't be coming back. " He groaned, crossing his arms as he stared defiantly at the much older man before him. " However, I had...business," He glanced over to Near again," to attend to...So I had to come back." His gaze was back on Roger as he finished his sentence, said man looking curiously between the two before nodding, seeming to have cooled off some.  
" Am I to assume you'll be staying?" He asked the rebellious teen in a tired voice. " Or are you just going to leave again?" His eyes looked irritated, but he remained calm in his voice.  
" As it is I can't afford to leave now. Given the circumstances, I am to quit the Kira investigation and remain here. I have already prepared my replacement, so the investigation is indeed in good hands. " The blond replied calmly with a look of determination in his eyes. " And just who IS this replacement, Mello? " The older man asked.  
Mello smirked and replied simply " Matt, of course."


	5. Chapter 5 : Broken Princess

A/N: Hello...If I even have any readers left...This is the next chapter...Yup...If anyone wants to give me ideas on where to go from here, I'd be very greatful...and I would credit yoooou...yeah. lol

Obsessed, Chapter Five: Broken Princess

'I can't believe he would do this to himself. I can't believe someone I feel so deeply for, someone I respect so much, would do that. I won't allow it. He can't take the easy road. I won't allow it! He can bear it, damn it! Just like I have all my life. He's strong. I'm strong. He can do it, because I can. I can't do it if he's gone.' Mello stood in his room, pacing back and forth in front of his computer. Matt had just been telling him about the Kira case, but he couldn't get his mind off Near. Taking a chocolate bar off the desk in front of him, he stopped to take a bite, hoping it would help him focus his thoughts a little. Just behind his desk was a window out into the black night. It was raining out, only enough to make noises against the glass. He looked out, oddly drawn to the sight. The blond felt the oddest urge to go out into the storm. He trusted his instincts, as he knew that his mind knew what he needed, whether it seemed right or not. So, trusting himself, he made for the front doors. Breaking through the double doors, he ran out into the cold pour of the rain. Water soaked his lithe form as he ran, heading for some unknown destination. He kept running until he saw a small figure in the grass, resting under a large tree out on the edge of the field. He pushed harder towards the form, trying to identify it. As he got closer, he could tell it was a person. Then closer, he could see they were dressed in white. It was...  
" Near! " Mello screamed out as he ran, forcing himself to go as fast as his body would allow. " NEAR!" He could tell the boy was unconscious, as he was on his side, a toy resting in the wet grass not too far from an unclenched hand laying limp in that same grass. He finally reached the boy's location, kneeling on one knee, and bending down to lift the boy's face from the cold, wet ground. He ran his other hand across Near's cheek affectionately before pulling him up by his shoulders into a sitting position. He began gently shaking him, trying to wake him to no avail. He then began slapping his face lightly. Still nothing.  
" Near? Are you okay? Come on, Near, wake up! " He was pleading to the unconcious boy. Sighing, he lifted the small form into his arms, carrying him bridal style back to the building's warmth. He ran throught the field, into the building, and up to his room where he put the frail albino on his bed and closed the door. Kneeling by his side, he began again trying to awaken the boy. Shaking, pleading, slapping, all to no avail. ' He needs to be warm. ' The blond thought. ' He needs to be out of those clothes..' He realized, blushing. Deciding it must be done, he stood and began to disrobe Near, starting with his shirt, then his pants and lastly his underwear and socks. He then redressed the boy in some of his older clothes, finding them still slightly baggy on the tiny boy. " Okay Near, come on. You've embarrassed me to hell, now wake up." He said to the sleeping teen. " Why were you even out there? Why were you asleep? Why don't you let me help you, dammit? I just...I just want you to.." He was babbling. Knowing the other was asleep, he leaned in slowly. " Maybe you need...true love's first kiss? Are you a princess Near? You'd be...Snow White...not Sleeping Beauty.." He said quietly as he closed the distance between their faces slowly. He pressed his lips to the others tenderly, in a featherlight kiss. He then pulled away quickly, berating himself for his stupidity. ' You can't kiss him, you idiot! He doesn't like you! ' He hit his forehead in frustration. " I'm an idiot. " He muttered, then noticed the younger boy shifting. Slowly, he was met with large questioning eyes.  
" Me-llo?" Near said his name questioningly. " Where...am I?" He slowly sat up, looking to the blond confusedly.  
" You've gotta be kidding me.." Mello mumbled to himself, eyes wide in shock. ' Okay...he just woke up...RIGHT after I kissed him...Awkward coincidence? I think not! ' Mello tilted his head to the side in confusion, then looked at Near. His gaze went from shocked to concerned to angry.  
" Near, WHY were you passed out in the rain? Were you trying to hurt yourself again? I told you not to do that anymore! If you hurt, inside, come to me! I can help you, dammit, you don't have to do that shit anymore!" Near looked guilty, then sad. " WHY won't you let me help you? I look up to you, I envy you, I lo-" He shut his mouth, then snarled. " I JUST WANT TO HELP, DAMMIT! AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH? IS THAT IT NEAR? " He was standing, his voice echoing in the small room. All his emotions, all of his pent up frustrations were exploding into words. " Mello, I...You don't understand! " Near tried to defend himself weakly. looking pleadingly into flaming eyes. " I can't tell you why it hurts... I can't let you know, because you're more than good enough, Mello. You're more than enough, I'm not...I don't want you to hate me...even more than you do. I don't want you to pity me, or be disgusted...because, Mello...you're so much more than enough." The albino was obviously hurt. He looked up at the blond, having averted his gaze in the midst of his speech, to find the blue eyes filled with concern and an unreadable emotion.  
" Near, I don't hate you. I just...I'm not good with emotions, or wording my feelings...I don't know how to express admiration, or envy, without anger..." He looked away guiltily at the thought of hurting Near." I just don't know how to react to you. But I want to be here for you. I want you to talk to me, because even when I seem like I hate you, I never want you to die, or hurt yourself. I never want you to resort to that, okay? " He put his hand on Near's shoulder comfortingly.  
" O-okay Mello." Near nodded weakly. Mello then remembered the boy's state of being and pulled away.  
" Near you should lay back down, you probably have a cold, at least, if not worse. How long were you out in the rain? When did you fall asleep? Why were you even out there? Are you okay? Are you cold? Do you need another blan-" Near cut the other off.  
" Please, relax Mello. My state of being is not badly impaired. I am slightly tired, that is all. As for how long I was in the rain, I fell unconcious before the rain began. I was outside enjoying the afternoon as Roger instructed me to, when two larger boys, I believe it was Grint and Quin, took away Optimus. One of them held me down while the other took it and threw it into the tree I was under. Once they left, I tried to get it down, fell out of the tree and unconcious. The rain started after that, as it was quite sunny out at the time." Near responded calmly. " You were out there that long? No one noticed and tried to help you?" The blond was outraged. That was absurd! Why wouldn't anyone try to help him?  
" I suppose not, Mello. Most of the others dislike me anyhow. I do not find their lack of compassion for me at all shocking. On many occasions my peers have proven themselves less than caring." The albino muttered, hinting at their knowledge of his self abuse.  
" Just...remember that someone cares, and someone will always help you when you need it, okay? " Mello looked at the younger boy seriously. " Whenever you want to hurt yourself, talk to me instead, and remember that people would be very sad if you weren't here. "  
" I...I will, Mello. Thankyou for your kindness." He looked up at the older boy with a small smile.  
" You are always welcome, Near." 


End file.
